I hope you are more kind to yourself now.
That you’ve learned that the sharpest teeth
Were often your own,
And that self-mutilation never did you much good.
I hope you have come to terms with the fact that
You are not in control
And God is God – and you are not.
I hope you have finally figured out how to put your anxiety to bed
When you close your eyes.
I hope you haven’t lost your appetite for life
And that you haven’t become cynical.
I hope you have outgrown your black and white thought life
And that you live in technicolor now.
I hope you still care.
I hope you still care for her.
I hope you believe the ones who love you
When they say they do.
I hope you say you love them too.
That you still know how to say sorry
That your success didn’t blind you
Nor your failures harden you.
I hope you still know how to change your mind
And remember your humanity. And that of others.
I hope you don’t rush to judge anymore.
I hope you have eyes to see people more clearly
And that you love them as they appear.
Remember how it felt when you were still here?
How insurmountable things were?
I am sure whatever you’re facing now feels the same;
Remember that you made it through before
And, God-Willing, you can do it again.
All my love,
Your former self